The alarm light was flashing above the door of my brother Tommy’s room at the nursing home prompting a nurse to walk a quick pace up the hall to find out if there was a problem.
When she walked in the room at The Pavilion at BRMC in Bradford, she didn’t see Tommy and asked his roommate where he was.
“He’s hiding in the bathroom again,” the roommate said with a smile while pointing to Tommy’s hiding place. The nurse opened the bathroom door, told Tommy to come out and stop ringing the alarm when he didn’t need help. He apologized by kissing her hand.
Tommy, who has Down syndrome, is a prankster, and has been since childhood. For the past six months, he’s enjoyed teasing other residents and staff at the nursing home during a transitional stay due to mobility issues. Several months back, degenerative arthritis in his ankle made it very difficult for him to walk, requiring him to primarily use a wheelchair for transportation.
During his stay at the facility, family and friends have visited him regularly, making sure he has snacks for the evening that include a half-cup of chopped up onions smothered with peanut butter. Odd as it sounds, and may taste, he has enjoyed this evening snack since childhood and becomes quite perturbed if it isn’t provided.
Another absolute delight for my brother has been his participation in the Kiwanis Kapers community benefit shows over the past several years. The production team, headed up by the very caring director, Kristin Asinger, made it possible for Tommy to have front and center stage in this year’s show. Asinger and the other producers did this by writing him into the script for several scenes and showcasing him for his signature song, “Elvira.”
The cast of children and adults couldn’t have been kinder to Tommy, pranks and all. During one rehearsal, he upstaged a couple of the actors by rolling behind them in his wheelchair and belting out his song.
Each night after the rehearsals, as well as the shows held earlier this month, Tommy would go back to the nursing home. The residents who were awake, as well as the staff, would ask him how he did in the show. They also want to watch the DVD of the show when it becomes available.
The point of sharing this story is that my brother has the good fortune of having family and friends in the community who care for him and visit him regularly.
There are a number of nursing home residents at his current home, and certainly at other nursing facilities, who aren’t as blessed as Tommy.
For whatever the reason, some residents have no one to stop in and visit even for a few minutes out of the week, month or year.
Often, they are overjoyed when general visitors to their wards stop and share a pleasantry or kind word. Kids and animals are often at the top of their lists for preferred visitors.
The smiles are abundant on the faces of residents when school children walk through nursing homes during Halloween parades or for other holiday events. A cuddly dog on a resident’s lap also makes their day.
With Thanksgiving now ushering in the Christmas season, there is one simple gift that doesn’t have to be purchased, but can be freely given to others confined to nursing homes or their own homes.
It is called the gift of visiting and it will likely be cherished by nursing home residents, as well as the homebound, long after the holiday season is over.
