LITTLE ROCK, Ark. (AP) — Ten weeks before my wedding, I put 140
invitations — beautifully letter-pressed on Crane lettra paper with
silver ink — into the mail, eagerly anticipating the flood of RSVP
cards marked yes.
Two days later, my soon-to-be-husband got laid off from his
newspaper job.
I went from sorrow to anguish to rage to worry: We’d just
invited 300 of our nearest and dearest to eat and drink on our
dime, and it was too late to postpone the festivities without
paying hefty cancellation fees. After a one-day pity party that
involved a two-hour wait at the unemployment office and a bloody
mary brunch afterward, we set about reworking our wedding in a way
that would be a little easier on the wallet without sacrificing the
elements of a very special day.
The first casualty: the pro videographer that I’d booked months
before. I forfeited the $100 deposit and recruited a college friend
who’d majored in broadcasting to record the ceremony. Then I sold
my beloved Kate Spade wedding shoes online (via the great message
boards on WeddingBee.com) and picked up a more practical pair of
silver flats on eBay that I knew I’d wear again.
What happened to us isn’t uncommon.
Weddings, typically one of the most recession-proof industries,
are getting smaller as the economy struggles. The average price of
a wedding was $28,385 in 2009, down 3 percent from 2008’s average
of $29,334, according to the 2009 Real Weddings Study by
TheKnot.com and WeddingChannel.com. Brides are cutting back, most
heavily in favors, rehearsal dinner costs and catering, the study
said.
“There’s still merriment. It’s not something that’s going to
deplete your bank account, but there are definitely ways around it
to still have your dream wedding,” said Sharon Stimpfle, deputy
site director of WeddingChannel.com.
The easiest fix? Trimming your guest list, Stimpfle advises. And
rethink the traditional Saturday night wedding; Friday and Sunday
weddings are significantly cheaper, as are daytime events, she
said.
Even before Jake lost his job, we tried to be thoughtful about
how to spend money on our wedding, picking certain areas to splurge
and others to save. We knew we’d spend the most on food and drinks
at a great reception spot, as well as on a talented photographer
and an unbelievable honeymoon. Everything else, we tried to do on
the cheap.
THE ATTIRE
I nearly gave up on finding a dress after many fruitless visits
to bridal shops. I refused to buy a dress if the shop cut out the
label, and I wasn’t loving anything I’d tried on with the label,
either.
One afternoon, I lazily browsed pre-owned dresses on eBay, more
out of boredom than anything else. One seller offered an ivory Anne
Barge sample in my size from a few seasons back. It retailed for
more than $3,000, and I impulsively made an offer of $500, thinking
it would never be accepted. I stepped away from the computer, ran a
couple errands, and when I came back I’d received the
congratulatory email. The gorgeous silk-satin strapless dress was
mine (and luckily, thankfully, wonderfully, it fit!).
And post wedding, I got a tax deduction by donating my dress,
veil and slip to Brides Against Breast Cancer (directions available
at BridesAgainstBreastCancer.org).
For my five bridesmaids, I selected gray chiffon dresses from
Watters & Watters and ordered them from NetBride.com to save at
least 40 percent on each dress. We also skipped the bridal shop for
my flower girl’s dress, opting instead for the affordable online
retailer PinkPrincess.com.
THE PAPER STUFF
I got all my paper goods — invitations, save the dates,
programs, maps, everything — from sellers on Etsy.com. Sure, the
thriftiest thing is to DIY all paper stuff, but I didn’t have the
skill, time or patience to do that. However, paying individual
artists throughout the country to craft our paper items made me
feel a little bit better than dropping $5 a set at the local
wedding shop.
We customized our invitations to keep them within our budget (we
used only one color of ink for the letterpress, skipped the
reception card and used an RSVP postcard) and we got a lot of bang
for our buck.
Likewise, we also used Etsy for our wedding programs — although
totally optional, I wanted them — and got them for less than $1
each.
THE DECOR
Decorating isn’t my thing. The idea of elaborate, expensive
centerpieces didn’t appeal to me even before Jake was out of work.
Another thing that didn’t merit a lot of excitement was a big,
traditional wedding cake, so we killed two birds with one stone by
putting three-tiered stands filled with cupcakes at every table.
Bada bing, bada boom, done.
We used stands from Martha Stewart’s craft line from Walmart,
though thrift stores would have been another good place to look for
vintage cake stands.
As for the dumb things we did — it’s easy to get too excited
about things at the beginning. Had I known we’d be a one-income
household come wedding day, I wouldn’t have dropped $100 on a
customized wedding Web site. Mywedding.com has fantastic, free
sites that look just as good as the paid ones.
I’d have also skipped the wedding-day transportation — we got a
22-seat trolley to drive six blocks — and saved $500.
But still, regrets are few. We had a sunny, 65-degree day, good
friends and family with us and an open bar. We didn’t notice a
single cutback.